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Zorluk: Çok zorEliminating Wordiness

The following passage is an excerpt from an essay about the invention of the automatic dishwasher.

Although Josephine Cochrane had no formal training in engineering, she resolved to design a machine that could wash dishes faster and safer than human hands. Working in a backyard shed with a local mechanic, she constructed a copper boiler with a wooden wheel that turned as hot water sprayed onto wire racks. She was motivated by the desire to solve a practical problem, and this motivation drove her to persist through multiple design failures until she completed it. Her invention was patented in 1886 and later won top honors at the 1893 World's Columbian Exposition.

Which choice most effectively eliminates the wordiness and redundancy of the underlined portion while maintaining grammatical correctness?

  1. A
    NO CHANGE
  2. B
    She was motivated to solve a practical problem, she persisted through multiple design failures.
  3. C
    Motivated to solve the practical problem, that she faced, she persisted through multiple design failures.
  4. Driven by a desire to solve a practical problem, she persisted through multiple design failures.Cevap

Cevap

Driven by a desire to solve a practical problem, she persisted through multiple design failures.
The correct option most effectively eliminates wordiness and redundancy by using a concise introductory participial phrase ('Driven by a desire to solve a practical problem') to modify the subject, which is active, clear, and grammatically correct.

Adım Adım Çözüm

1
Identify wordiness and redundancy in the underlined portion.
The original sentence contains passive voice ('She was motivated by') and redundant phrasing that repeats the idea of motivation ('desire to solve... and this motivation drove her...').
ACT English prioritizes conciseness and clarity; expressing the same idea multiple times is incorrect.
2
Evaluate the grammar of the concise alternatives.
The option beginning with 'She was motivated' is a comma splice. The option containing 'that she faced' incorrectly sets off a restrictive clause with commas. The option beginning with 'Driven by a desire' is both grammatically correct and concise.
An option must be grammatically correct to be the right answer, even if it is concise.

Anahtar Kavram

Eliminating Wordiness
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Eliminating Wordiness

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