Eliminating Wordiness

Consider the following passage:

The botanist carefully examined the rare flower which was a flower that was growing in the greenhouse and noted its unusual coloration.

Which choice for the underlined portion best eliminates wordiness while maintaining the meaning of the sentence?

During night-time excursions along the coast of Puerto Rico, kayakers often witness a spectacular display. The water glows with a brilliant blue-green light whenever it is disturbed by a paddle. This phenomenon is caused by microscopic organisms known as dinoflagellates, which are tiny creatures that are too small to be seen without a microscope and emit light when agitated.

Which of the following choices, when replacing the underlined portion of the sentence, is the most concise and grammatically correct?

The following passage contains an underlined portion.

Many historic lighthouses along the Atlantic coast are undergoing extensive restoration to repair the damage caused by decades of exposure to salt spray and high winds. At the Cape Hatteras Lighthouse, it was decided by engineers that they would stabilize the sandy foundation, this process will prevent the structure from listing.

Which of the following represents the best replacement for the underlined portion?

The following passage contains an underlined portion.

In 1900, physicist Wallace Sabine revolutionized architectural acoustics during the construction of Boston Symphony Hall. Prior to Sabine’s work, designers relied on guesswork, which often resulted in concert halls with poor sound quality. Sabine, however, calculated the exact rate of reverberation, a process that was done by him through analyzing and studying the absorption properties of various different materials. As a result, Boston Symphony Hall became the first auditorium designed with scientifically formulated acoustics.

Which of the following choices most effectively refines the underlined portion of the passage by eliminating wordiness while maintaining grammatical correctness?

In 1964, inventor Douglas Engelbart designed the first computer mouse, which was a simple device carved out of a block of pine wood. The device featured a single red button on top and two metallic wheels on the bottom that tracked movement. Because of the fact that it was made of wood, it was remarkably durable, though it looked very different from modern plastic mice.

Which choice most effectively and concisely expresses the underlined portion of the sentence?

In 1915, mathematician Emmy Noether formulated a theorem that fundamentally altered the landscape of theoretical physics. Noether’s theorem proved that every differentiable symmetry of the action of a physical system has a corresponding conservation law. For instance, rotational symmetry—the fact that physical laws do not change regardless of spatial orientation—[underlies the conservation of angular momentum, which is a principle that is clearly demonstrated and shown when a spinning skater draws in her arms to rotate at a faster rate of speed].

Which choice most effectively eliminates wordiness and redundancy in the underlined portion of the passage?

Consider the following passage:

In 1948, a graduate student overheard a supermarket executive asking a university dean to develop a system that could automatically capture product information at checkout. Inspired by this conversation, Norman Joseph Woodland and Bernard Silver set to work on a solution. Woodland eventually created the first barcode by drawing lines in the sand on a Miami beach, extending the dots and dashes of Morse code into vertical shapes. It was in the year 1974 that the very first commercial scan of this new barcode system was finally performed and carried out on a pack of chewing gum in Ohio.

Which choice best minimizes wordiness while maintaining the meaning and grammatical correctness of the sentence?

At the 1893 World's Columbian Exposition in Chicago, Josephine Cochrane showcased her newly invented automatic dishwasher. A top prize was won by the machine, which was because the judges were highly impressed by its design and efficiency.

Which choice is the best version of the underlined portion of the sentence?

During the construction of a fort near the Egyptian port city of Rashid in 1799, French soldiers uncovered a large slab of granodiorite that would later be known as the Rosetta Stone. The stone, which had writing carved into its surface that was written in three different scripts, proved to be the key to deciphering Egyptian hieroglyphs.

Which of the following options, when substituted for the underlined portion, creates the most concise and grammatically correct sentence?

In 1938, museum curator Marjorie Courtenay-Latimer noticed a strange blue fish among a local trawler's catch. This fish was a coelacanth, which had been previously thought by scientists to have gone extinct and died out millions of years ago. Courtenay-Latimer contacted chemist J.L.B. Smith to identify the specimen, confirming the survival of a lineage dating back 400 million years.

Which choice best maintains the clear, concise style of the passage?

In 1856, eighteen-year-old chemist William Henry Perkin was attempting to synthesize quinine, a drug used to treat malaria, in his home laboratory. Instead of quinine, he accidentally produced a dark sludge that, when diluted with alcohol, turned a beautiful shade of purple. Perkin had created mauveine, the first synthetic organic dye, which was an invention that would go on to completely revolutionize the entire global textile industry.

Which of the following options is the most concise and grammatically correct replacement for the underlined portion?

In 1957, engineers Alfred Fielding and Marc Chavannes sealed two plastic shower curtains together in an attempt to create a textured wallpaper. This invention, which was created by them for the purpose of covering walls, did not succeed as home decor, but it soon found a new purpose as protective packaging material.

Which of the following choices, if substituted for the underlined portion, would best eliminate wordiness while preserving the meaning of the passage?

In 1948, biophysicist Maria Telkes and architect Eleanor Raymond designed the Dover Sun House, a residence that relied entirely on solar energy for heating. The system that heated the house relied on chemistry, utilizing Glauber's salt, which is a chemical compound that stores heat, to maintain a comfortable indoor temperature. During sunny days, the salt absorbed heat from the sun and melted, storing thermal energy. As the temperature dropped at night, the salt solidified and released the stored heat back into the house.

Which choice best replaces the underlined portion to express the idea clearly and concisely?

In 1911, physicist Ernest Rutherford proposed a nuclear model of the atom based on his famous gold foil experiment. He observed that while most alpha particles passed straight through the foil, a small fraction was deflected at large angles. Due to the reason that the vast majority of the atom's mass is concentrated in a tiny nucleus, the deflective behavior surprised the scientific community. Which choice most clearly and concisely replaces the underlined portion of the sentence?

In 1977, researchers aboard the research submersible *Alvin* made a startling discovery on the ocean floor: hydrothermal vents teeming with life. Prior to the time when this discovery was made by the researchers, scientists believed that all life on Earth ultimately depended on sunlight for energy.

Which of the following is the best revision of the underlined portion of the sentence?

In 1913, journalist Arthur Wynne created a new game for the *New York World* newspaper. Initially called a 'Word-Cross,' this puzzle was shaped like a diamond with a hollow center. Wynne's creation proved to be incredibly popular, and it established a precedent that would soon go on to become a staple of newspapers across the country.

Which of the following is the best revision of the underlined portion?

Venus flytraps are carnivorous plants that capture their prey using specialized leaves. When an insect touches the sensitive trigger hairs on the inner surface of the trap, the leaves snap shut in a fraction of a second. [1] The rapid closure of the trap, which happens in a very fast and quick manner, prevents the insect from escaping. The plant then secretes digestive enzymes to break down its meal.

Which choice most effectively and concisely completes the sentence?

In 1967, astrophysicist Jocelyn Bell Burnell was analyzing radio telescope data when she noticed a series of rapid radio pulses. These pulses, which occurred with a highly precise regularity and kept repeating at constant intervals, initially baffled astronomers, who jokingly named the source 'LGM-1' for 'Little Green Men.'

Which choice most effectively and concisely replaces the underlined portion of the sentence?

The following passage contains an underlined portion. Choose the alternative that is most concise, grammatically correct, and preserves the original meaning of the sentence.

In 1921, Frederick Banting and Charles Best successfully isolated insulin at the University of Toronto. Because of the fact that insulin is a hormone that regulates glucose levels in the bloodstream of the human body, their discovery transformed diabetes from a fatal disease into a manageable condition.

Which of the following alternatives to the underlined portion is the most concise and grammatically correct?

In 1952, computer scientist Grace Hopper developed the first compiler, a pioneering technology that translated English-like instructions into computer code. By streamlining this translation process, the writing of computer programs was made to be a task that was far faster and more efficient than before by her.

Which choice most effectively and concisely completes the underlined portion of the sentence?